Happenings on the Doormat

There's a lot happening here.

The front door mat is just a glimpse.

If only you knew the half of it.

Actually, nah, I don't think I want to share ALL of it anyway.

It will likely come across as quite dramatic, depressive and destructive.

Sure I'll share a little bit here and there on this blog.

Interestingly, so far, it's mainly about the Mum stuff and struggles of motherhood, trying to add some light to the situation and trying to insert a little humour and entertainment along the way,

HOWEVER that doesn't change the fact there's a lot going on here.

Projects, ideas, EFT, beliefs, therapy, diving into my own subconscious thoughts and uncovering why I've ended up in repeat patterns over the stretch which is my life.

Maybe these modes will help my featherbrained attempt at this blog today?

Speaking of doormats the three year old just peed on ours the other day.

Unable to reach the toilet door handle yet, he probably figured the mat was a can't hold it any longer next step option.

I'll say it again. There's a lot going on here.

Often, my life feels like it's falling apart and at the lowest of lows.

Often, I am just holding it together when opening up another Zoom meeting to update on what feels like increasingly slow progress.

Hearing comments that make me itch with uncomfortableness. Truths which I would like to hide from sometimes.

Often, I want to throw it all away and start with a new fresh and empty page, thinking that it will magically fix a whole stack of problems. But it doesn't.

I've heard myself say recently "this is not how I imagined my life to be".

I've heard myself say recently "this is not what I've been waiting for".

"this is not what I've been working for".

"Pull yourself together".

Write those bloody blogs and say you...NO prove you are who you say you are.

I'm talking fluff out my bum again.

Even after getting up early and specifically to jump onto writing and finalising multiple drafts - here we are talking in circles and not even making much sense.

I'm meant to be a storyteller yet so many stories feel unjustified right now.

There are significant problems in my life I've been trying to ignore.

Okay - enough.

I'm turning the black screen back on to see the mess of red lines that were the next step towards getting this post done.

Doormats serve a great purpose.

And keep our shoes clean in the process.